how to manage anxiety in grad school

How I Manage Anxiety in Grad School

Image via STIL through Unsplash

gGrad school is a different beast to undergrad. The stakes are higher, because now, I find myself doing work that can launch a career. And the margin for error is smaller. It doesn’t take much to fail, and if I do, there is often an impact on people other than me. The combined workload of my courses, thesis, and research work is a lot heavier than undergrad, and at this point, I’m also starting to get a very scratchy itch to see what life is like outside of school (I’ve been a student for nearly 20 years!).

If anxiety sets in, I start to feel like I’m in a pressure cooker, and I get a sinking, helpless feeling in my gut when I realize how much I have to do. This is when I tend to procrastinate, which provides a very temporary escape, but in the end, only worsens the way I feel.

I know I’m not alone in this (and if you can relate, neither are you!). Other grad students (see here too) experience anxiety, and it’s something that can be managed. I know that immobilizing nervous feeling all too well, and while I’m far from perfect, I have some strategies for keeping my anxiety under control. I don’t always follow them, but when I do, they help me a lot.

However, I’m not a professional, so don’t substitute this for professional advice. If you’re in need of help, you can go to your local student wellness office. If you’re in a crisis, you can call your local emergency number.

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6 Goals For the Second Half of My Twenties

sSo this is it: I’m a quarter century old! I haven’t really been big on my birthdays, but I’ve been thinking about this one for a while. This feels like the start of a new period in my life. Up to now, I’ve been going to school. I’ve thought a bit about what I’d like to do, tried, failed, and it feels like I’ve been kind of waiting for a life beyond school to come within reach. Now, it seems like I’m finally getting there.

Even though this last year has had some really difficult moments, and I’ve learned that life doesn’t always go the way we want it to, I’m still so hopeful about this year of life ahead of me. There are 6 things in particular that I want to focus on.

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Little Pink Book: 5 Lessons I’ve Learned About My Dating Preferences from Online Dating

Little Pink Book is a blog series about dating smarter, not harder as an ambitious, Christian, millenial woman. Read the rest of the series here. If you’d like to submit a post to this series, send a pitch here

MMy first foray into online dating was brief, confusing, and disappointing, but I fired up another dating app (not Tinder, probably never Tinder) for round two. This app is different from the last one in that it doesn’t have a daily limit for the number of potential matches you see and allows guys to message girls first.

Round two lasted about three weeks before I needed to back off and focus on other things (hello, deadlines!). I didn’t realize how much time and energy dating takes up. Nevertheless, I learned a lot about who and how I like to date. Here are five of the biggest.

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Little Pink Book: The Fickleness of Online Dating Doesn’t Have to Work Against You

Little Pink Book is a blog series about dating smarter, not harder as an ambitious, Christian, millenial woman in a big city. Read the rest of the series here. If you’d like to contribute, send us a pitch here

TThe first time I got rejected by a guy I met online, it really sucked. I’m used to the idea that when I meet someone I feel a mutual attraction with, it’s special. Offline, I’m not meeting people I want to mutually get to know better very often. So imagine my surprise when a guy who said he enjoyed talking to me suddenly told me that we shouldn’t talk anymore.

What I didn’t understand about online dating then is that it’s fickle. People are bombarded with options on a daily basis. When you’re speaking to someone who is one of many, that person isn’t terribly special (at least not at first).

That’s a double edged sword of online dating–being to made to feel undervalued–but on the other hand, I’ve found that it’s key to avoiding placing a guy on a pedestal and dealing with rejection.

Continue reading “Little Pink Book: The Fickleness of Online Dating Doesn’t Have to Work Against You”

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New Blog Series: Little Pink Book

II am a firm believer that girls should date smart. There’s too much advice telling us not to be too picky, and not enough advice telling us to be intentional with what we want or that we should have standards. I’m not here for taking what I can get. I’m here for respect, good conversations, and meeting my non-negotiables.

I know dating isn’t perfect in 2018 (or ever), but I’m big on learning from experience and not making the same mistake twice (…ok, three times). Little Pink Book is a blog series encompassing the lessons I learn in dating as an ambitious, Christian twentysomething in a big city. It’s about stories. It’s about enjoying the journey while taking ourselves seriously enough. It’s about learning to laugh at things that used to make us cry. I want Little Pink Book to empower us start a conversation about how to make dating work for us, and not the other way around.

I’m excited about this project, and I hope you are too! Please feel free to share your stories–I’d love to hear them. Here’s to 2018 being our year.

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Image via Lisa Fotios from Pexels


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