ecret: I’m an introvert who has extroverted friends. This means I get invited to…parties (dun dun dun). If you’re like me, you’ve probably felt an uncomfortable feeling creeping in when a party’s coming up. While potentially fun, parties can also be draining.
I am very grateful to have friends who consider me enough to invite me to their events. It’s important to me that I support my friends by showing up and enjoying myself, and it’s taken me several years to figure out how exactly to do this.
I’m still learning, but there are a few things I’ve learned to do that help me out.
In my first year of university, I had no idea what I was doing with my life, until I woke up one night in tears, determined to resolve my existential crisis. I wrote a list of all the things I believed I needed to be happy. I asked myself, of these, what are the minimum I would need to have happiness? And then I asked myself, what career will get me closest to the majority of items on my happiness list? After that, it was pretty easy to narrow it down. I chose to pursue a highly competitive career. And boy, am I feeling that pressure now.
Dress: Design Lab (old) | Shoes: Zara (old) | Clutch: The Shoe Company (old) | Bracelet: ASOS | Earrings: Amazon | Perfume (travel size): Burberry
his journey of wearing no makeup for a year has had some unexpected consequences. My appreciation for simplicity is spilling over into what it means for me to stand out.
I have learned to value standing out from a young age. As a child, I stood out with my puffy braids and tall height. As a teenager, I valued standing out as a way of creative expression. As a student, I value standing out academically. In employment, I value standing out due to hard work. I’m used to obvious ways of standing out–things that are hard to miss.
However, what I have been learning as I go through my days without makeup is that it is not necessary to be loud and noticeable to make a statement. Sometimes, letting things speak for themselves is enough.
I’ve worn and loved a cat eye liner, pretty much without fail, since age 17. When I knew I was heading into a task that seemed humongous, I put on a full face of makeup, drawing strength, courage, and comfort from my “war paint.”
Makeup and I have gone through a lot of things together. But I’ve been realizing over the past year that I put too much stock in it. I need to take a break from it this year.
ne of the goals I set for myself for 2016 is to be better with money. To save, to learn about investing, and not to waste (or spend money I don’t have) on things I don’t need. This goal came about in two ways. First, I went to the bank, and was served by a very handsome teller whilst broke (a sad bank account is never cute, ladies!) And second, I read this article about compound interest, and was shocked to find how much money can grow if I start saving & investing it early.
As a student, I will be broke well into the foreseeable future. So I’ve had to ask myself how I can look good and save on a very limited budget. I’m still learning how to answer this question, but here’s what I’ve learned so far.
hen I moved to a different city for university, I hated the process of moving so much that I bought a book on how to have a minimalist lifestyle. I wanted to get rid of my stuff so I’d never have so much hassle ever again. While my minimalist life didn’t last long (or even start), there were some lessons that stayed with me. One of them is called the 80-20 rule. In The Joy of Less: A Minimalist Living Guide, Francine Jay writes about this rule, which basically says that we tend to wear 20% of the clothes we own 80% of the time. I’ve found this to be true for me, and I’ve been thinking about how I can maximize that essential 20%. I don’t want to think about what to wear in the morning. And yet, I still want to look put together.
In order to do this, I asked myself some questions. First, what’s comfortable for me? Second, I asked myself what kind of clothes fit my lifestyle? Third, I asked myself what do I want to look like? And finally, I asked myself what can I afford?
he summer before I started university, my mom took me shopping. I was ecstatic. I had so many dreamy visions of what I wanted to look like, and had thoroughly convinced myself that I would finally be able to dress & look the way I wanted. I wanted to look artsy and pretty and cute 100% percent of the time.